By now, many of you know that Chase is headed to the Super Bowl in a few weeks, but there was a part two that unfolded even as Chase was in the hospital for his tests this week.
I don’t know how many of you know this, but Chase’s grandparents (Ellie’s parents) took on our entire family, round-the-clock childcare and so much more when Chase was diagnosed with cancer. They gave up an empty nest to house a displaced, confused, way-too-loud family of six and all that entailed.
We can never give them back all the time, but with Robbie Gould’s help, on the eve of Grandpa Poole’s 71st birthday, we were able to pull off the most amazing surprise.
This one goes out to all the caregivers caring for other caregivers. For every soul with a ripped heart who ever comforted their child as they watched a suffering grandchild.
We see you.
We know you’re out there.
THANK YOU.
And y’all – Chase really needs people on Twitter today using the hashtag “WPMOYChallengeGould” – find “ChaseAwayCancer” on Twitter now and retweet this video or one of the other Robbie-related tweets. If Robbie’s name is the most mentioned on Twitter, then Nationwide Insurance will donate $25,000 to Ann & Robert H. Lurie Children’s Hospital of Chicago.
Once again, there are less than five hours left to this year of 2018. This year has seen us through many things and all along, we have prayed for the strength to choose joy. To that end -the joy part, or in this case, the hysterical laugh-until-you-cry part- I’ve compiled a few status updates from my Facebook page.
I chronicle these things (and have done so for many years now) because life is too short and childhood is even shorter and there are too many parenting moments when you’re faced with the choice of either laughing or melting into a puddle of tears. So, as much as possible, despite the changes that come with age and time and …maturity (?) …we choose to laugh.
Many of the scenarios include personal hashtags: from the most common – #LifeWithBoys, to the most sarcastic [playing off our secret parenting fears] #NotScholarshipMaterial, as well as a few quest appearances by Bob Ewoldt (husband) and Ed Poole (grandfather) –
“These houses are for dummies? They look pretty good to me, Mom.” #NotScholarshipMaterial #FlipFail
“Mom, if Aaron Rodgers was my parent, he might do a better job than you. Maybe.” #LifeWithADeathWish #SelfEsteem
8:30PM: Don’t forget the field trip money tomorrow, okay? Aidan: Okay. 6:50AM: Aid, the money… Aidan: I’ve got it. 7:32AM: Aidan, are you sure you’ve got the money? Aidan: I’m sure. I’ve got it, Mom. 8:38AM: Final warning… we are getting in the car. Aid, are you sure you have the money? Aidan: What money…? 8:39AM: Are you kidding me, Son? Aidan: Totally! I’ve got it, Mom.
NARRATOR: But Aidan didn’t have the money… #SchoolForTheGifted#
“Hey! Just because I stoled it from you does not mean you get to use your angry voice with me!” – yelling #Irony #LifeWithBoys
“But you never *specifically said* I had to do my required reading in English.” Come se dice ‘grounded’ en espanol? #VidaConChicos #NoMaterialDeBecas
** Note: no creativity was squelched in the making of this post. The only thing curtailed was spending 20 minutes figuring out how to butcher “I want ice cream” in Spanish. **
“You never let us do anything fun ever and you’re probably the worst, meanest mom. ~ A completely logic-based rebuttal on being found throwing the football in the living room…again. #Grounded #LifeWithBoys
“He’s the best punching bag I’ve ever had.” ~ See? It’s not that hard to think of a nice thing to say about your brother. #ThisIsWhyWeCantHaveNiceThings
“Oh good grief, I swear I’m going deaf. I can’t see anything anymore, Mom. I mean it.” #DramaTeen
Hormonal Tween Sister: “I’m going to e-x-p-l-o-d-e!”
Accelerated-Education Brother: “You’re going to explore what?”
TFW the football game is very stupid because there’s no tackling allowed and then you tell the ref he’s stupid and then, because the ref is also your dad, you get ejected from the game and grounded. #KeepingItReal #Struggle #ParentingGains
When your umbrella has a lightning rod, or perhaps, your lightning rod has an umbrella.
Mom: “It’s rather a serious design flaw.”
Me: “With Dad or the umbrella?”
Mom: “Yes.” #TheMemorableEdPoole
“But we were doing trust falls…!” #LifeWithBoys #TrustFails
“I know we’ve never explicitly discussed your use of kitchen tinfoil for the making of an ax…to chop off your brother’s head…and yes, it does look very realistic and you’re very creative, but… hey… where did you get police tape…?” #LifeWithBoys
“But you said we couldn’t play ball in the house with a ball…you never said we couldn’t play soccer in the house with an apple.” #NotScholarshipMaterial
“I’m not saying we would actually listen to you more, but it’d probably help if you used a megaphone.” #LifeWithBoys
Life with boys in a nutshell… August 7, 2018
[brings me an envelope marked with school district official lettering, dated April 26, 2018]
“Here, Mom! This was in my backpack. Um, you should probably open this RIGHT NOW because I think it’s important.”
“Are you from another planet? Do you think life is all about fun? THIS IS NOT A FUN HOUSE. Now, go work!” 3:14PM – The exact moment I turned into my father.
Suggest that the baby name his new stuffed pig “Bacon” ONE TIME… and suddenly, *I’m* the villain of the piece. Psh… #NotWinningThePopularVote
::HOW TO GET GROUNDED FOR LIFE::
Me: “You need to go downstairs and clean up the basement.”
Child [snorts derisively]: “What am I? Your butler?”
Me: “You need to get moving…like, right now.” Boy [arms and legs spread proudly in the doorway]: “But a captain always goes down with his ship!!” Me: “Just get out of the car so I can close the garage, okay?” #Doomed #LifeWithBoys #CaptainsLessThanCourageous
Boy 1: “This is something important. Like, one of the most important things in the whole world!”
Boy 2 [snickering]: “Like underwear?
Boy 1 [sage older brother voice]: “Psh…underwear isn’t important.” #LifeLessonsWithBoys
“So wait, what are all the words I’m not supposed to say in front of people…?” #LifeWithBoys
Me: “…and that’s why it’s kind and appropriate to hold doors for women.” Karsten [grimacing]: “So wait, I’m supposed to hold the door for ladies. …and you too?” #LifeWithBoys #ChivalryIsDead
Me: “Are you going to clean up the kitchen floor like I asked you to…?” Chase: “Look, this has been fun but I’ve got a plane to catch.” [runs out of the room] #GroundedForLife
“But how could you hit you head against the wall of you were standing still…and were not even close to the wall?” #Conundrums #LifeWithBoys
“For the last time…KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN WHEN YOU WALK.” #LifeWithBoys
9:45 PM – “Mom, Karsten changed my phone to Spanish and now I can’t find anything. How do you say ‘English’ in Spanish?”
Someday we will laugh about this…
Probably not today.
Is it Friday..? Please, let it be Friday…
#lifewithboys #parentingFTW
“YOU HAVE TO HELP ME FIND SOCKS BECAUSE YOU ARE MY MOTHER!!!!!” Oh good… it’s one of *those* days. #LifeWithBoys
#LifeWithBoys #NoFilter #HelpMeJesus
So apparently, I never explicitly said “Hey, guys…don’t take the mattresses off the beds.” Silly Me. #LifeWithBoys
Bob: I’ll get the kids ready for bed, El. Me: Aw, thanks, Babe. That’s so ki— [looks up at him] …
[bowing excessively] “Thank you, thank you very much. My name is Karsten and I’ll be your hero for the evening. You’re quite welcome, little lady.” – anonymous child with clear self esteem issues #LifeWithBoys #HelpMeJesus
Chase: “Mom, why can’t I go outside? Can I go outside now? What about now?” Also Chase: “Mom, I feel like you should know that everybody -like, for real, everybody– is complaining because you won’t let them go outside.” #RabbleRouser #LifeWithBoys
“Mom! You do know we men know how to take care of ourselves, right? [growls] And where did you put my Spider-Man blanket?” #LifeWithBoys #Irony
“No, you can’t use your brother for target practice.” #LifeWithBoys
“But you always say we can’t because it’s dangerous, Mom! You need to come up with a new reason!” #LifeWithBoys
There are so many crazy things that happen during the year and this year especially, I haven’t gotten very much time to post on social media, but wow, these kids make me laugh, so here are a few never-before-seen quotes…
** THE BONUS ROUND **
“So, it’s a ‘no’ on football in the house every time? – clarification, boy-style.
“But he was looking at me like he wanted me to trip him! And then falling on his face was just an accident. Really!” #WontHoldUpInCourt
“I don’t care how angry you were at your sister. Mooning her is never an appropriate rebuttal to the argument!” #LifeWithBoys
“At what point did drilling holes in the side of the garage seem like a good idea?” #NotScholarshipMaterial
“But I didn’t know it was going to flood the bathroom!” #TheEndOfBathtime
Goodnight and goodbye, dear old 2018 …
Moment by moment.
“The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.” Psalm 16:6
We had this idea for the “8 For 8” only 24 hours ago, and now, I’m tucking the brand new eight-year-old and his fuzzy head under his worn out Spider-Man blanket and whispering for him to sleep sweet – while you have given just over $1700. (!!)
And the thing is, the money is coming from friends and neighbors.
It’s also coming out of the pockets of cancer kid siblings and 2nd graders who sit in a classroom with my boy.
It’s coming from people we’ve never met, and it’s coming in 8’s and 100’s and sacrifice.
And it’s for Chase, yes, but it’s for Rusty and Noah who fought so brave.
It’s for Mia who should have seen 8 herself.
It’s for Julia and Daniel and Sophia, Matthew and Maddie and Rosie, Aaron and Isaac and Dylan, and… I could name so many more. Too many more.
For those who breathe and fight and those who’ve won and on behalf of Chase and for the others who stand with him – THANK YOU.
Eight years, one boy, one [insanely amazing] community… one thousand, seven hundred pieces of straight-up, you-and-what-army, cancer-can-suck-it MAKING A DIFFERENCE.
THANK YOU, dear ones.
We love you.
Two things…
1. There are still hours in this day and the donation link is still up and running, so raise the roof!
2. Because we love you all and today is such a big day, I’m breaking a personal rule (never post til the cards are mailed!) and putting up a picture from our Christmas card shoot. Just because… ❤️
This 2014 story blog is very nearly two years old and yet I desperately need this lesson today as much as I needed it on the day it was first written down.
Who do I follow? Who will you follow today…and why?
The cold snapped in the air as the sun shone distant and too bright through the windshield of the car as we traveled along the road. Chase’s first day of therapies. A new building, new people, new things to be learned…the start of a new chapter. And with the new, came the old and familiar: the fear of the unknown and the question – what lies ahead? Always that question.
Chase’s high voice pierced the questions gripping my mind like my hands holding the steering wheel. “Mommy? Where are we? This is not the road to my hospital.” For this is how Chase tells direction. There is the road that leads to his hospital and then there is every other road ever made. I answered and assured him that this road was a good road and that it was the way to his new therapy – therapy that would help him grow strong.
Silence followed for a brief second as he processed what he’d heard. Then; “But Mom, are we late?”
“No, Chase. We aren’t late. We are right on time.”
Another moment of silence, then his voice again, this time with anger, “But Mom, this isn’t the road and we’re late!”
Steeling myself for the familiar exercise of reasoning with the irrational; I responded: “Chase, this is the road and we are not late.” I received nothing but an angry growl and the reiteration that I was in error.
How many times would I need to speak truth to him before he heard?
Finally, this; “Chase, do you trust me? I know this road and I can see the clock. I know where we’re going and I know that we’re not late. You don’t know this road, but I do. I’ve driven on it before and I know where it goes. Chase, you’ll just have to trust me.”
The petulant retort; “Mom, I can’t trust you because I cannot see the road and I cannot see the clock. You can; but I cannot.”
Suddenly, his voice was mine….mine to my Creator who speaks truth to me and calms the questions and fears at every turn. He tells me that even though I don’t know the road, He does. He knows where it goes and what’s along the way. He knows the timing of it and how it will take me to places that will be hard but will make me stronger. And I sit, petulant child that I am, and question trusting Him because I don’t know what He knows and somehow, in my small heart and mind, that makes Him seem less good and my fears seem more justified.
In that moment, that silly short moment of driving across the city, in the child voice from the back seat, I was reminded how good He is to me and that I don’t have to know what lies ahead to trust and follow.
Moment by moment.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11
